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Menopausal Mother Nature

News about Climate Change and our Planet


Let the global warming duel begin! | Columns | – Logan Daily News

I have been challenged to a global warning duel by fellow Loganite Steven J. Saines. At my age, 87, I should know better than to be dueling anyone. If he had challenged me to a footrace, I would have had to turn him down. If you have ever seen me try to run across Main Street, you’d know why. It’s not a pretty sight.

Mr. Saines seems to have a very low opinion of common sense, so, if I feel the urge to use those words, I’ll substitute “smarts,” instead. Like, “He don’t have enough smarts to get in outta the rain,” or, “See how quick he solved that problem? That man’s gotta lotta smarts.”

First, I’d better give you a bit of info on how I have come by the few smarts I have managed to save in my dotage. I quit high school when I was 16 or so. Not a good thing to do when trying to accumulate smarts. However, when drafted, I had enough smarts back then to qualify for any naval service school, even without a high school education. They claimed my IQ was about 135.

I was sent to a Service School and was taught precision optics and qualified to become an Opticalman. I was taught optical theory, machine shop, the repair all the optical instruments on naval vessels, from compasses to sextants and gun sights to periscopes. After I got out of the US Navy, two and a half years of night school finally got me caught up in my more or less formal education. A few more select college courses let me learn more about things that I was really interested in, including art and writing.

I’m not sure if that IQ really had much meaning. Only one job I ever applied for wanted to know what it was. I told them, but didn’t get that job. They said I was over-qualified. I guess they wanted only dumb janitors at that place.

After being turned down for that janitorial position, I got a job working in a place that made precision aerial mapping lenses. Other jobs followed in the same field (the aerospace industry) including building and testing the high resolution lens for the lunar orbiter. It was used to make mosaic maps of the moon’s surface to enable future astronauts to land safely on its surface. I helped build the 88–inch diameter telescope mirror for the University of Hawaii on the summit of Mauna Kea.

The reason I’m going through all this meaningless drivel, is because sometimes my weird sense of humor might make it appear as if I had fallen off a potato truck and landed on my head here in Logan, Ohio and I don’t have a lotta smarts. In fact, I have lots of smarts. I have smarts that I haven’t even used yet. I save them for when I get challenged to duels. (I’ll bet Steve is shaking in his boots right about now.) So, here goes. ‘

First of all, I do not disbelieve in climate change. I firmly believe that our climate IS changing. As I said, it changes constantly. Our climate is never at rest for a moment.. As our earth rotates, its gases get mixed up constantly. It is a great big area of total chaos and man can ever control it. Never! All we can do is ride out it endless variations. Too many uncontrolled and random things are going on in that atmosphere of ours at the same moment and we don’t fully understand most of it.

If this duel isn’t about climate change, then what is it about? I’ll stick to global warming for now. That is the seed that was planted by 97% of all scientists, wasn’t it?

I know! I know! That old saw, “97%,” has been discredited by many other more knowledgeable scientists many times. However, that particular little seed was fertilized and nurtured by lesser scientists and beaten into the ground ad infinitum by Hollywood, politicians, various governments (including our own), and our own Fourth Estate. For some unknown reason, it refuses to die a quiet death.

Oops! I have been blithering and blathering about things for so long, I don’t have time to finish this thing in a proper manner. Don’t worry though. Read my next column and I’ll quote nothing but credible scientists and tell you what the true story of global warming theory really is. And, how long this truth has been known!

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